A word from the driver

People. Training for this relay was TOUGH. Just look at the preparation I’ve gone through the last few months…well, weeks. Okay, hours:

• Flexing and extending my foot. A lot. My ankle is feeling very warmed up and limber. I should be able to brake AND accelerate NO PROBLEM.
• Staying up late watching old episodes of 24. Season 2 was pretty awesome. How is an atomic bomb not awesome? I digress. All this TV watching was a total sacrifice for the team. If I can’t keep myself up for Jack Bauer, how am I going to for a bunch of crazy runners? I’m ready. Jack has trained me well. Including how to really effectively torture someone…no slacking off, runners. I have powers of persuasion you will not want to experience. That should keep you running. None of this “Rah rah rah! Shish koom bah!” nonsense.
• Planning my outfits. This may have been the hardest part of my training. There are two completely opposite ways to take advantage of the fact that all the people I will be with for 2 days will be sweaty and, well, gross (no offense). 1) I just relax, wear sweats and sneakers, pull my hair back in a ponytail and enjoy not being stressed about how I look. OR… 2) Um, hello?! With minimal effort I will look 10 bazillion times better than anyone I’m with this weekend. Normally I’m the schlub at preschool pick up with the perpetual ponytail…now’s my chance to shine. If I flat iron my hair, throw on some lip gloss and wear some cute shoes, I’ll look like a supermodel in this sweaty crowd.  Since one should not divulge all training secrets before the big event, you’ll just have to wait and see what approach I take.

So there you have it. The grueling training regimen of a running relay van driver. Those runners should be GRATEFUL all they had to do was RUN. Easy peasy.